It Is Impossible Not to Sometimes Be A Snob

The true snob never rests; there is always a higher goal to attain, and there are, by the same token, always more and more people to look down upon.

Everyone is a snob about something; a self-proclaimed expert in a thing or two, and is therefore entitled to think less of lesser things and the people who like them, or at least know less about them than the expert. But my list is short. I’m reasonable, and I try to like people.

Yesterday, I was asked if I’m a beer snob. I replied that my only real standard is to avoid beer that college students would use to play drinking games; I’m a grown-up, after all. For those uninitiated with extra-curricular activities involving age-appropriate beverages, beer used for drinking games is among the lowest quality, bottom-of-the-barrel alcohols one can buy without having to make it at home (only bathtub gin, moonshine, and grain alcohol are worse). One can find it prominently displayed en masse at gas stations and convenience stores. To put it another way, if a store stacks it in the aisles and not in the refrigerator, then I don’t want it. It comes in aluminum cans because glass bottles are too classy. One sip and you’d say “Surely, the bottle is more than what it contains!”  That’s bad. Thanks, but I enjoy my life and do not want to reduce the years of my life with something so foul. Maybe with other things, but not that. The world is replete with better vices.

It’s the sort of cheap beer that leads non-beer drinkers to say “Ew, beer looks, smells, and tastes like urine. Gross.” Gross, indeed. So is knowing how urine tastes well enough to say that something else tastes like it… but that is mostly neither here nor there.

I had to stop and think for a moment to define “snob,” to decide that I’m not one. A snob is a person who’s so dedicated to particular thing or category of things that he or she is condescending toward those who don’t share the same taste. Not everyone with a favorite thing is a snob.

Calling something a ‘favorite’ is as  simple as preferring one thing or type of thing over similar things without needing it exclusively, or selling one’s soul to have or like it.

I prefer Pepsi, but I won’t turn my nose up at the thought of drinking Coke, nor would I refuse to eat at a somewhere because they don’t serve Pepsi. “Ew, that’s a COKE restaurant! Let’s troll Yelp for something else.”

That’s ridiculous and I am not like that. The end.

P.S. Although, if we can go back to alcohol for a second for a moment (without assuming it implies anything at all about me: rum and Jack Daniels taste better with Coke than with Pepsi for reasons a career drinker might know. And that I don’t know the difference means I am hereby not such a snob regarding inhibition-reducing drinks, as everyone already knows.


10 Responses to “It Is Impossible Not to Sometimes Be A Snob”
  1. LaNeshe says:

    We all have our “things” nothing wrong with that!

  2. amy says:

    I’m a simpleton, but I won’t drink beer.

  3. Rachel says:

    …I’m taking you to an AA meeting one of these days, sir. Your liver will thank me for it later. 😀

    I’m such a good friend.

  4. Rachel says:


  5. thriftyrn says:

    We just have so many things in common….it’s uncanny. I prefer Pepsi, too! 😀

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